Write an opinion column for us next month. @Mag meets every Tuesday night at 8 p.m. in Buzzard Building, Room 2434 on the campus at Eastern Illinois University.
Or you can contact Ken at: demonseed_just_add_water@yahoo.com

Major Lessons In Education
As the prospect of graduation begins to loom larger and more ominously for students across the country, one thing is beginning to become abundantly clear within America’s education institutions. Education is not necessarily about broadening one’s horizons or fulfilling personal potential, but rather, about procuring a monogrammed piece of paper and avoiding the real world at all costs.
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Delve Into Something Embarrassing
This opinion is more advice than anything else. I had a really good experience last week and I think it is only right that I share it with you so you may experience the same. It is really easy and I’ll give you my own experience as a guide to help you through it.
I want all of you reading this to do something really fun for yourself within the next 24 hours. I want you to take my advice and indulge in two different kinds of sports just for the sake of having fun and doing something good for your body.
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Corporate Casualties
Culture Robbed From the Cradle

I believe artist Andy Warhol said it best while explaining his art when he commented, “Everything comes back twice in its lifetime. It first presents itself as something cultural, something with significance and meaning. During its second coming however, most movements, instead of being a cultural happening are merely a commercial liability, and usually end up in the end as dead as their creator.

Not only were Warhol’s words extremely prophetic concerning his own work, but also in many ways foreshadowed many “second comings” which he would never live to see. Think to yourself for a moment and try to come up with just a few of the things in the 90s and beyond that have resurfaced.

Well, there was the second long swing revival, a momentary renewed interest in the clothing of the late 60’s and early 70’s, and a resurrection of the putrid ghost of disco just to name a small few. In many cases, original cultural phenomenon are given a second chance through a resurgence in interest that starts as a mere blip on the radar but gradually grows larger, in many cases because of nostalgia, and somehow continues to pick up momentum. That is, picks up momentum until a corporate conglomerate sees it, wants it, grabs it, bastardizes it, chews it up, regurgitates it back up with intent to sell, and ends up making a hefty profit; killing it dead.
Just ask the Coca Cola and Gap companies where swing went after those “clever” ads appeared on television for four months non-stop. Or ask the Subaru Company how many cars they sold in the early 90’s using the slogan; “ It’s like punk, except it’s a car!”

These are prime examples of how something so pure as resurging musical forms can be ground into the dust by industry. Alas, these things are fads and should be treated as such. What however happens to slang and the teenage axiom of reinterpreting and rearranging language to make it their own?

Inevitably, every year, as some sort of ritual rebellion against authority, young adults effortlessly come up with a new batch of slang and expressions that they can rightfully call their own. Yet as soon as they are thought up they disappear.

In years past, much of teenage culture has been by large ignored by the populous, but somehow, starting in the eighties and continuing into the 90’s, there has been a renewed interest in all things teen. This may be in part due to the profitable teen market, nostalgic businessmen trying to connect to some lost piece of childhood, or a plethora of other just as easily dismissed notions. Whatever the reason, people now seem to go out of their way to exploit teenagers especially when it comes to their culture and vocabulary.

One look at movie multiplex billboards or a perusal of Billboard’s album charts will give just about anyone a glimpse into the stir that teenagers have somehow managed to cause. In some cases, films like John Singleton’s “Boys in the Hood,” Kevin Smith’s “Clerks,” or to a lesser extent, Larry Clark’s “Kids,” made a valiant effort to accurately represent generations X and Y. Sadly these movies still fell into the trap of creating badly made archetypes and even blatant stereotypes of people in their early twenties and late teens.

Even magazines like Spin, Rolling Stone, Webster’s dictionary, and small town papers have delved into teen culture and slang.
The moral is this, while adults may have a fascination with teen and popular culture, most attempts to cultivate a piece of the language and the style end in the death of a purely positive creation. It’s just that some attempts ring hollow and therefore completely negate their purpose.
In the words of punk revolutionary Johnny Rotten, “Do you ever get the feeling you’ve been cheated?”